TGD RELATIONSHIP CORNER
Good day ladies. How are you doing? I have a fictional
account of a true life story I'll like us to deliberate on.
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Sebastian had spent six years pursuing Yewande, trying to
convince her to marry him. After much prayers and effort, Yewande agreed to
marry him. After the flurry of wedding activities, they eventually got married.
Yewande was a virgin until she got married. She waited
for her husband to be the only man to see her nakedness. She and Sebastian had
kissed (passionately) twice during courtship. Once Sebastian had showed her his
erection when she had innocently being whispering into his ears while they were
taking a bus ride. So, she was relatively assured that she was marrying a
virile man.
On their wedding night, Sebastian told her, for the first
time ever, that he planned to spend that night praying for their future and
that there would be no love-making that night. Yewande was disappointed and
hurt that her husband had taken such a decision without letting her know. They
prayed as Sebastian wanted and eventually consummated the marriage a few days
later.
Yewande was deeply hurt by Sebastian's action on their
wedding night and she began to withdraw into her shell. She began to act coldly
towards Sebastian. They are experiencing some turbulence in the marriage
currently.
My questions are
1. Was Sebastian right to have made the decision to spend
the wedding night praying without involving Yewande?
2. Was Yewande's hurt justified? After all, it was good
to pray for their future.
3. Should Yewande have tried harder to convince Sebastian
to consummate on their wedding night?
4. Is it appropriate to discuss the wedding night during
courtship or while making wedding arrangements? If yes, can the lady initiate
such a discussion? If yes, are there tips to guide her to initiate such a
discussion?
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